Weird thoughts...

Where do they come from?  The other night i told a friend a mine about how i recently got a telemarketer to hang up on me after i told her that she interrupted me from training my pet spider monkey how to not try and peel my uncircumcised penis like a banana.  His response was, "Oh my god, what the fuck is wrong with you? How do these thoughts enter your mind?"

And i thought about that for a minute, and i really don't know.  It just came to me, i didn't really have to think about it.  It was just another weird thought I had. Where do weird thoughts in general come from, funny or otherwise? That's what i wanna know.

I remember this one time i was outside hanging out by myself reading, and no one was really around,  then all of a sudden, out of nowhere, i suddenly had the thought that i should jerkoff.  And i immediately knew that was weird, but where it came from or why, I have no idea.  And of course i didn't jerkoff, I'm not an animal, I don't have to act on every thought I have, but that doesn't mean I didn't have it. 

If I knew where weird thoughts came from and how to control them then I'd probably rule the world by now.  But since I don't, I'm just another weird white guy that frightens Asian women.

Traditionally the trifecta of quantifying a woman's hotness, in no particular order, were, tits, ass and face.  Now, I'm not complaining about the original holy trinity, it has served us all well for generations and personally I am a big big big big big fan of them. But I've always felt like something was missing from the equation, that it wasn't taking something meaningful into consideration but could never but my finger on what was missing.

Well Eureka I've found it! Ladies and gentlemen, boy and girls, let me introduce to you the newest parameter in ranking a woman's hotness, "The Fuck Zone".  The Fuck Zone is defined as the area on a woman's body starting at around the naval and ending approximately half way between her crotch and knee. And it is fantastic. This is definitely a region of the body that our eyes are automatically drawn to and we all check out but never had a way to easily identify to our buddies. Until now. 

Below are pictures of Sara Underwood from Attack of the Show.  Not only is she a perfect example of an excellent fuck zone but she also was the inspiration for this revelation. As i was watching her on G4 tonight i realized i couldn't stop staring at that sweet, supple fuck zone area as i imagined spreading 1000's of my dead babies all over it.