70-year-old virgin seeks wealthy mate

http://blogs.ajc.com/news-to-me/2012/05/11/70-year-old-virgin-seeks-wealthy-mate/?cxntlid=thbz_hm

To me this is the same scenario as the dude who refused to sell his issue of Superman #75 (the one where he dies) outside of Charlie's Comix for $100 after he just paid only $10 for it because he thought "its gunna be worth a lot of money some day".  Then 20 years later he's forced to sell it for $9 and handjob. And he's the one that got a handful of cock. Sorry “Sexational Pam” but not everthing appreciates with age,  you gotta learn the art of "selling high." 

I wouldn't touch your crusty old vergina even if i were compensated handsomely to do so.  Your fuck-hole is probably riddled with ancient STD's like "bubonic taint" or "twatrotis" that haven't even been checked for in a century.  And not only are you old and gross but i also contend that you are a lying gold digging motherfucking whore.  Do you really expect me to believe that you had a shot at fucking Englebert Humperdinck and you actually turned it down?  Bullshit.  Good luck trying to snowball some dude into your dried up old cooch and I hope you die before I ever have to hear your name again.  Really, what whore passes up Englebert Humperdinck's dick?  LIAR!

Weird thoughts...

Where do they come from?  The other night i told a friend a mine about how i recently got a telemarketer to hang up on me after i told her that she interrupted me from training my pet spider monkey how to not try and peel my uncircumcised penis like a banana.  His response was, "Oh my god, what the fuck is wrong with you? How do these thoughts enter your mind?"

And i thought about that for a minute, and i really don't know.  It just came to me, i didn't really have to think about it.  It was just another weird thought I had. Where do weird thoughts in general come from, funny or otherwise? That's what i wanna know.

I remember this one time i was outside hanging out by myself reading, and no one was really around,  then all of a sudden, out of nowhere, i suddenly had the thought that i should jerkoff.  And i immediately knew that was weird, but where it came from or why, I have no idea.  And of course i didn't jerkoff, I'm not an animal, I don't have to act on every thought I have, but that doesn't mean I didn't have it. 

If I knew where weird thoughts came from and how to control them then I'd probably rule the world by now.  But since I don't, I'm just another weird white guy that frightens Asian women.